Fix Contempt in Relationships Today For Couples in Austin, TX

Betrayal – Common Marital Therapy Issue

Betrayal is a common marital therapy issue. Marital therapy can help couples struggling with all different types of betrayal. Here is one example of betrayal I work with in my marital therapy practice.

One Example of Betrayal

What comes to mind when you think of betrayal in marriages or betrayal in relationships?

Did you think about comparing your spouse to others as a form of betrayal?

This type of betrayal can erode the emotional bond you have with your significant other. When you compare your spouse or partner to someone else nobody wins.

You don’t win.

and…

Your partner doesn’t win.

Something to think about…What message are you sending when you compare your spouse to someone else? Think about how your spouse might be interpreting this message? How it might make them feel?

Often these messages do not align and can be hurtful to relationships.

Here’s a hypothetical example:

When Jane sees her friend’s husband picking up the kids from school and planning trips for them to go on as a family. She starts to wish her partner would do the same. Jane then starts to fantasize about what this would be like if she had a partner like this. Fantasizing about all the ways her life would be different.

One day, Jane gets upset with her partner and expresses her wish that he was like her friend’s husband. Saying things like: “why can’t you be like him?” “he treats his wife wonderfully.” “I wish I had that.”

This is a no-win situation for Jane’s partner.

And, a no-win situation for Jane.

Jane’s not seeing the entire picture. She’s captured a snapshot of something and stretched it into something that might not be the entire truth.

Why this can feel like a betrayal to partners…

It can make your spouse feel inferior
Can lessen the special bond you both have
And can impact trust and communication

If you’re noticing that you compare your spouse to others and want help, marital therapy can help. Contact me today.

By: Anna McElearney, LMFT, LPC, NCC

*Blog is intended for educational and informational purposes only.