Reduce Marriage Problems After Baby
When all you can think about is sleep no wonder many new parents experience marriage problems after bringing home baby.
There’s simply no time to think about sex, spending quality time together, date nights, household chores – shoot, there’s no time for yourself let alone for each other…
When all you want is sleep – there’s just not a lot of extra energy to be spent!
Having a new baby brings change.
Things will be different for everyone! Getting adjusted and finding your rhythm takes time, teamwork and practice.
But change can be wonderful! Hard – yes! But also wonderful!
Change can help you and your spouse grow closer and can help your new family bond and grow together.
But there are some common marriage problems that can happen during the early days, weeks and months after bringing your newborn home.
- One parent might feel as if they aren’t allowed to do anything around caring for the baby. They may feel criticized that they aren’t caring for the baby right – or aren’t doing x, y, z right.
- One parent might feel resentful that the other gets to leave to go to work while they have to stay home.
- One parent might feel neglected by the other because they aren’t getting the attention that they did post baby.
- More arguments and snapping at each other can happen – so very common – and can lead to marriage problems. You both are sleep deprived. Adjusting to the transition of having a new addition to your family that needs you 100%. Figuring out what to do about household chores that aren’t getting done. The list goes on…
Marriage Problems Can Change Too – Into A Deeper Bond
While marriage problems are common after adjusting to parenthood, they don’t have to ruin your relationship.
You can deepen your relationship after a having a baby. It is possible!
- While finding time to spend alone together, where you’re not sleeping or exhausted, is difficult, it can be done – creatively. For example, this might be just a moment where you embrace each other and let each other know what a great job you both are doing. Or maybe you make each other a cup of coffee in the morning. Any “little” gesture of affection can mean so much.
- Gratitude can go a long way. Let each other know how grateful you are for each other, for the new life you now have, for the family you have, etc. Gratitude is powerful and can help shift some marriage problems.
- Ask each other what each needs. Allow time for each partner to have a moment where they can have time just for themselves. To replenish. To refuel.
- Ask for help. Whether this is from relatives or friends. If you need help, ask…
- Asking for help also includes seeing a marriage counselor for support.
By: Anna McElearney, LMFT
If you live in the Austin, Round Rock, Cedar Park area and need help, contact me today. I can help.
*Blog is intended for educational and information purposes only.
