Repairing Relationships...

Repairing relationships after an argument or disagreement can be difficult at times. Often there are hurt feelings. Feeling unsure about how to apologize. Feeling misunderstood and frustrated. This next relationship consideration focuses on just this...repairing relationships after an argument, disagreement, or error of some kind.

Thou shalt correct all errors, including injustices and injuries,

at once or as soon as possible,

and not make dispute of who was the original perpetrator. (Stan Tatkin)

How often, when arguing with your partner, do you want to be acknowledged as being right? Or, acknowledged as the one that wasn't doing anything and didn't start it? It can be easy to lose sight of what's important when you're arguing with your partner or spouse. It can be easy to get caught up in who's right and who's wrong. Or, who started it and who didn't.

Repairing Relationships Can Heal...

There are two things that are really important to consider in repairing relationships after an error of some kind has happened.

How you both go about repairing and reconnecting after a disagreement or argument
And how soon after the error is the repair done

"Correcting all errors, including injustices and injuries, at once or as soon as possible" is significant in relationships. This is important in all relationships - including your relationship with your children - in addition to being important with your spouse or partner. The longer perceived injustices are left without being sufficiently addressed, the more likely these events will be remembered. Which can sometimes be the cause of continuous reoccurring arguments. What's needed is relief from the original injury or injustice. If you're facing a challenge in your relationship and need help sorting through how to heal, please contact me. Through couple therapy, marriage counseling or individual therapy, change is possible.

By: Anna McElearney, LMFT *Blog is intended for educational and informational purposes only.